affleck gets decked cafe Uber cigarette cold brew emergency room movie Brad Pitt

as reply to Ben Affleck Cheats on

Affleck giggled. Then he was about to take a sip of his 
cold brew
when somebody came over and decked him in the face. That was the last thing he remembered. He woke up in an 
emergency room
. He thought about saying "where am I?" but that felt like something he'd say in a 
movie
so instead he kept his mouth shut. Because he wasn't in a movie. This was real life. But who the hell got decked in the face while sitting at a 
cafe
in real life?

Celebrities maybe. Asshole celebrities like him who people hated. That came with the game he supposed. But still he was unhappy that he had gotten decked in the face. Nobody deserved that.

He ripped all the IVs out from him, got up, found his shoes and left the room without telling anyone. He expected someone to chase him down as he walked down the hall but nobody did. Everybody was too busy looking at their clipboards, ipads, and phones or another type of screen.

Outside he tried hailing an 
Uber
but realized he didn't have his phone anymore. The person who decked him must've taken it. Instead he had somebody else's phone. It had no apps installed on it besides the bare minimum. Fuck he thought.

"Need a ride?"

It was a Camaro. Inside was
Brad Pitt
wearing sunglasses and smoking a 
cigarette
.

"Come on in stranger."