We all like to please others, but sometimes it is just necessary to say "No".
Saying "no" doesn't mean that you are rude, selfish, or unkind. This is an unhelpful belief that makes it hard to say "no". When we are young, we don't seem to be bothered by saying "no", so why do we change when we get older? It is because as children, we learnt that saying "no" was impolite or inappropriate.
We hold onto this childhood belief, and we continue to associate "no" with being rude, selfish, or unkind. We are concerned that saying no will result in us feeling rejected, ashamed or guilty. Saying "no" does not mean you are a terrible person.
Saying "no" to others can be self-care, rather than selfishness. We are somehow geared to always respond to others' needs, and if we continue giving, it can lead to burnout. We need to say "no" to others to say "yes" to ourselves. If you fill your days with other people's needs, there is no time left for you.
Unless we can assist ourselves first, we may find ourselves becoming resentful or angry, not because we want to give or help others.
So, look after yourself a little more, embrace that two-letter word and say: "No, no, no, no, no".
Saying "no" doesn't mean that you are rude, selfish, or unkind. This is an unhelpful belief that makes it hard to say "no". When we are young, we don't seem to be bothered by saying "no", so why do we change when we get older? It is because as children, we learnt that saying "no" was impolite or inappropriate.
We hold onto this childhood belief, and we continue to associate "no" with being rude, selfish, or unkind. We are concerned that saying no will result in us feeling rejected, ashamed or guilty. Saying "no" does not mean you are a terrible person.
Saying "no" to others can be self-care, rather than selfishness. We are somehow geared to always respond to others' needs, and if we continue giving, it can lead to burnout. We need to say "no" to others to say "yes" to ourselves. If you fill your days with other people's needs, there is no time left for you.
Unless we can assist ourselves first, we may find ourselves becoming resentful or angry, not because we want to give or help others.
So, look after yourself a little more, embrace that two-letter word and say: "No, no, no, no, no".
