fear

Westcity
eerie feeling as reply to To Her

Abraham Kim
fear Imogen Howe
She checked the time. This flight was too short. She wished she was a few thousand miles east now. She wasn't ready.

Suddenly she felt that same fear . The same discomfort that haunted her in the darkness of that strange highway exit. Outside that strange house with the lights on...

Westcity
she needed a payphone as reply to Better to be safe than sorry

Abraham Kim
Imogen Howe fear payphone
A domino was pushed. Signals were sent. An irreversible chain was underway. All because  Imogen Howe took that exit off the highway.

She didn't know this yet though. The phone call that came was just like any phone call. In fact she missed it because she was asleep. Only saw it...

Westcity
an image as reply to In front of her school

Abraham Kim
fear Spacecity nonchalant
The world was falling apart.

It had been the whole time. "We didn't start the fire". When she first heard it in high school. Her civics teacher told her what it meant. And it felt so true.

Marianna was bold in expressing her opinions. That history had always been violent. She would...
New Job Anxiety
I can identify with this new job 
anxiety


Even though i can't actually ever shake the feelings of 'what if i'm not good enough'

i know that truthfully that 
fear
is driven by the 
ego
and is not very useful.

But i still fall for it because i have ego lol.

Ultimately it doesn't matter if you're not good enough for the job. You'll just either become good enough through training -- which the company is anticipating -- or if you can't learn timely-enough, you'll just get a another job. That other job will have its own pros and cons. 

It's not like your life's ultimate validation of success or failure is dependent on how this one job pans out.

Good luck to you sir!
Abraham Kim

Westcity
Ms. American Pie

Abraham Kim
fear life whiskey desire cafe Ms. American Pie Chevy Raspberry
The words rung into the air suddenly. It frightened her. She was scared to ask the man singing beside her. In a past life the  fear would've drove her against it. She would instead live her entire  life not knowing the answer to the question.

But today things were different. She...
the only thing that's real
love it. chilling, but true.

'
pain
,
fear
,
ostracism
, they all become necessary but bareable payments for the only thing that's real.'

i interpret this as learning to stop giving a shit about what other people think so you can lean into your values/desires. 

seems hard to do when you're always wondering how someone is going to react
William Liao

Solo Echo Practice
the only thing that's real

Abraham Kim
desire fear pain ostracism
Always, all that is required is a  desire .
For if you have that, then everything else becomes secondary.

pain ,  fear ,  ostracism , they all become necessary but bareable payments for the only thing that's real.

80 years if you're lucky. 100 if you're blessed.
At the end you'll be dying...

Abe's Blog
V2

Abraham Kim
Thomas Pynchon fear Twitter TikTok V2 Gravity's Rainbow ICBM
V2 rocket program.

Gravity's Rainbow by  Thomas Pynchon .

A novel inspired by a single concept. That sprawled into an entire web of stories.

All coming from one human, timeless value: fear .

The  ICBM will take less than half an hour. It will arrive with no sound. It's probably better if...

Abe's Blog
The pyramid of intimidation -- Excitement

Abraham Kim
fear Github Maslow's Hierarchy code HTML Sublime Text phony badass Old Abe
Similar to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, I can recount going through stages with different levels of intimidation when confronting software. In the beginning, any thought of code intimidated me. Any mention of apps, the command line, or even HTML websites struck the feeling of imposterhood deep into me.

Excitement It wasn't...
Trauma
Thanks for sharing. I agree with the proverb
phaidenbauer
shared.

When it comes to
trauma
, we
fear
  the ones that will haunt us. But I think the deepest are the ones we aren't aware of. They affect our everyday behavior and are essential ingredients to our
personality
 

I do not think there is a risk free way to confront and conquer trauma. I kind of see trauma like a wedged in arrow. If you remove it there must be a plan to do some type of recovery. Otherwise leaving it in will be better. 

Abraham Kim