This is the first thing you should do if someone is choking 2021-01-24 20:07:11

I saw an article the other day with this headline. I didn't click on the article because I already know the answer. The first thing you should do if someone is choking is to start laughing.

Now, this may seem counterintuitive, but choking is funny as long as you're not the one choking. When someone is choking, gasping for air, eyes bulging out starting to water, not able to breathe, that's funny. I didn't write the rules of comedy, so don't look at me. I'm just saying what is. So as soon as someone starts choking, you need to laugh to get it out of your system. Once you've regained composure, then you can rush over and provide the help that may determine whether someone lives or dies.

Let's say you don't laugh and immediately dive into life-saving actions such as the Heimlich maneuver, CPR, or mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. You're trying to concentrate on the task at hand and THEN you have a case of the giggles. Now you're in a pickle. Time is of the essence, and while this person is turning blue with a brain that is being deprived of oxygen, you can't stop laughing.

So remember this the next time someone nearby starts choking with the potential to leave a family with exorbitant medical and funeral expenses and one fewer income stream. Laugh first. Get it out of your system. You can even dial 9-1-1 as long as you get it together in time to provide the operator with the details necessary to send help. Once you are confident that there are no more giggles left, then and only then, should you spring into action to save a human being from permanent brain damage, life-long rehabilitation, or death, which of course is not funny.

I couldn't help myself and had to record this as an episode for the Brandonian Doctrine podcast.

Brandon Wilson

Weekends are where posts go to die Improvements are only temporary until they become part of who you are
Lmao this one was good. I feel like many will never get past the cringe portion. But I love how you judo the cringe into care.
2021-01-24 22:46:19
This is the kind of thing that cracks me up. I'm hoping it helps me find other people who have the same twisted sense of humor.
2021-01-25 01:06:23