I went through most of sixth grade not making new friends. Instead, I noticed that I was spending more time with kids I had previously avoided. Losers. I was a loser and so the last type of kid I needed around me was another loser.

i went through most the year feeling deflated. My days weren't filled with my usual spark. Anyplace I went didn't seem to care that I was there. If I were to think deeply about it, it was undeniable that I could go days without anyone wanting to come talk to me. At school at least. At home my life was still good. My mom still doted me, and my dad and Noah were still around.

This is probably why I went through most the year passed not knowing how deflated I felt. Home provided just enough love and touch that I could wile way my eight hours at school being a nobody without too much pain. In fact I remember at some point in sixth grade me just accepting that I would be a nobody forever. I had seen movies and TV shows where the Asian guy played no substantial role. They were basically a flat character there just so a joke would be possible.

I had always feared such a life. For most my life I was motivated to not become that trope. That is until midway into sixth grade. When I just told myself, I guess I saw this coming.

For some reason, this post reminded me of Johnny Cash's song Nobody bonus reference to no time as well!
2021-03-21 21:34:13
Initially I wondered how this would make you think of that. Then I thought about this being a TV show and this song being played either at the end or the beginning of an episode. In that imagination the song fit really well lol.
2021-03-28 16:55:08