Too Young for Rock and Roll

"Who even comes out for Rock and Roll? Is it only old people who like it? It sure seems like it." Matt said between sips of some cleverly named double hazy IPA. The foam from his beer clung to his mustache, causing it to droop. 

"What do you mean?" I asked. Matt pointed to the crowd dancing next to the bar. The band was playing some rock tune about drinking too much and having sex in a port-a-potty. Matt's finger slowly pointed out the white-haired dancers in the crowd. One... two... three... four... on and on like that until he had counted a dozen seniors among the crowd of 25 or so dancing to the music. Then one of the old women in a tye-dye shirt and a polka-dot skirt locked eyes with me. She beckoned me to dance making the "come hither" motion with her hand and winking. My brain after two whiskeys and a Newport was foggy. I let my instincts guide me to the floor.  

We danced for three songs before I disappeared to the back patio. A moment later she followed me out to the porch and pinched my behind. She grabbed my hand, pulling me in the direction of the bathroom. Matt came by with a beer in tow for me at the same time. I wrestled my hand away from the woman and grabbed the beer. She kept going like nothing happened and grabbed another young guy closer to the bathroom door.

"I told you, rock is for the oldies." Matt joked as he wiped the foam from his mustache. 
How many IPAs did this person drink that night? did any other person try to get at them? Why does Matt seem like an ass?
2021-08-31 00:45:42
This is a mostly true story that happened to me on Saturday. She didn't pinch my butt, but the rest is real. 

Matt is a combo of all my buddies, lol. Pretty much Dave D. plus a couple of other guys. 
2021-08-31 02:41:27