The weather sucks, it's cold, and it's raining. I called a cab to go shopping. I arrived at the supermarket and told the cab driver to wait for me in the parking lot. Hey man, I'll be back in 5 minutes. When I entered the supermarket, I did not have a phone, so no medical pass, so I could not get in. The security guard would not let me in, but I pushed through, told him not to touch me, and went in. I bought the one item I needed (a yoga brick) and walked out. I hopped in the cab and headed home. This morning I went to get vaccinated - booster - the 3'th dose fuck. Why am I writing trivialities? A few days ago, I watched a French movie, "Chien - Dog 2017." A man in his 40's is turned into a dog by his wife. One morning says to him: "I went to the doctor for my allergy. He said the reason for my allergy is you. You have to leave," And she throws him out of the house. The house they bought together, and he continues to pay for. The same place where she will continue to live with her son and invites her lovers. The man is broken, turns into a dog. Fuck life. I feel for him, but you know what? If you let women fuck you up, they will.
I think writing trivialities is the most important thing actually.
Not to say that the having written of the trivial is the greatest outcome there is.
But I know that writing down my trivialities serves me well. It's like they get processed a different way instead of having to have them tumble around in my head incessantly.
Just like a picture is worth a thousand words.
a trivial thought written down is worth the same as that triviality flashing in your head for a thousand days.
i retain the thousand measure just for pastische sake but actually it's probably like 1:200 days or so.
so you can either think a lingering thought for 200 days or you can write it down and have just as much processing and departing-from done in that one day.
I think what gets people though is they require permission. Not just in writing but this applies to everything.
They're not willing to do something unless some immediate validation for some action taken.
That's why I notice people when they first start writing online like here or back in the good ole
But that doesn't last for most because most people are not interested in their trivialities. They began writing them and sharing them simply because they wnted someone else to tell them they had good thoughts or that what they're going through is meaningful.
This is the biggest lie.
Your trivialities are important.
If it helps to share them with others then share.
but in the long run your trivialities are priceless only to you.
and until you accept that, they will linger for longer than they would had you confront them yourself.
writing is one way of confrontation but not the only way.
The hesitancy can come also from a form of fear of being judged I think. Some people never get over this and they self-censor constantly. And that sort of mentality creates monsters.
I like this "writing is one way of confrontation but not the only way."
Before when i did, I might have had more passionate relationships but i was imprisoned by how others thought of me.
These days i get my validation elsewhere, a rocksolid home life. And so anything my friends give me is a bonus. It's dessert. Nice to have but not needed.
It's made making friends much easier to add.