It has been a few weeks since my died ( & ) in contrast to the of my other grandfather () back last year, this one is haunting me a little bit.
I don't sleep bad or anything, but throughout the day, though not every day, my brain reminds me that he is dead. Every time that thought comes up, I'm drifting into a fun I have with him. So, I feel like my brain wants to think about the good times back then.
This week we also collected my grandmother, and so she is spending a "vacation" at my parents' house for a few weeks. Seeing her and his house "empty" was hard for me. I wonder how long it will take until I fully realise he's gone forever. I thought that process would take only a few weeks, just like last time, but it seems like it will take way longer.
I also wonder how my mother is coping with it. She doesn't show much, but it could also be that I don't notice it, as we do not see each other every day.
But anyway, life goes on, and I will be heading to a short shift now...
I don't sleep bad or anything, but throughout the day, though not every day, my brain reminds me that he is dead. Every time that thought comes up, I'm drifting into a fun I have with him. So, I feel like my brain wants to think about the good times back then.
This week we also collected my grandmother, and so she is spending a "vacation" at my parents' house for a few weeks. Seeing her and his house "empty" was hard for me. I wonder how long it will take until I fully realise he's gone forever. I thought that process would take only a few weeks, just like last time, but it seems like it will take way longer.
I also wonder how my mother is coping with it. She doesn't show much, but it could also be that I don't notice it, as we do not see each other every day.
But anyway, life goes on, and I will be heading to a short shift now...