"You hear that new song by Kate (Full) Bush?"
"No, is it any good?"
"I didn't listen to it. It has a strange title: 'I'm too poor to buy razors (and my electric razor stopped working.')"
"That is odd. And I generally don't approve of parentheses in song titles."
"Are there any you do approve of?"
"Stones, of course. (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction."
"That's a good one. How about (Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay"
"Yes, I'll allow that one."
"(You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party)"
"Yes, that one too."
"I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)"
"The parenthetical is fine but my problem is with the contraction. 'I would' is a critical part of the chorus, so it shouldn't be a contraction. And did we ever find out what that is?"
"Supposedly it's self-explanatory but I never got it. I guess we'll never know now that Meat Loaf is gone."
"Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)."
"I guess, but it sort of betrays the ambiguity of the song. Most people think of it as a wistful end to a journey, but I heard it's about some bad break-up. I do like how the album version left in the screw-up at the beginning of the song."
"That’s the Way (I Like It)."
"It's necessary for that one unless you want to put the 'uh huh uh huh' in the title."
"(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman."
"Unnecessary. I don't approve of that one. Although nowadays it seems we have to clarify when we are talking about a natural woman vs whatever is passing for a woman."
"I'm not going to touch that one. Pride (In the Name of Love)."
"Yes, necessary for that one, and you know U2 rarely does wrong."
"Rocket Man (I Think It’s Going To Be A Long Long Time)."
"Great song, but they blew it on the title. Rocket Man is enough."
"(Your Love Has Lifted Me) Higher and Higher."
"I'm on the fence with that one, but it's a great song so I'll allow it."
"P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing)."
"Allowed for the explanation factor, and I'm glad they didn't do that for O.P.P."
"You down with O.P.P.?"
"Yah, you know me!"
"That is the one and only proper response."
"She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft)."
"Absolutely! One of the great song titles."
"Tonight’s the Night (Gonna Be Alright)."
"I'll allow it but Rod lost me on You’re in My Heart (The Final Acclaim). That one is unnecessary. Did you know that song is really about football?"
"Soccer, you mean."
"Soccer in the US, but everywhere else it's football. So I know you can go all day on these things. I need to head out."
"Okay, one more. Dude (Looks Like a Lady)."
"Absolutely, especially because I always think of that great scene in Mrs. Doubtfire."
"No, is it any good?"
"I didn't listen to it. It has a strange title: 'I'm too poor to buy razors (and my electric razor stopped working.')"
"That is odd. And I generally don't approve of parentheses in song titles."
"Are there any you do approve of?"
"Stones, of course. (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction."
"That's a good one. How about (Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay"
"Yes, I'll allow that one."
"(You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party)"
"Yes, that one too."
"I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)"
"The parenthetical is fine but my problem is with the contraction. 'I would' is a critical part of the chorus, so it shouldn't be a contraction. And did we ever find out what that is?"
"Supposedly it's self-explanatory but I never got it. I guess we'll never know now that Meat Loaf is gone."
"Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)."
"I guess, but it sort of betrays the ambiguity of the song. Most people think of it as a wistful end to a journey, but I heard it's about some bad break-up. I do like how the album version left in the screw-up at the beginning of the song."
"That’s the Way (I Like It)."
"It's necessary for that one unless you want to put the 'uh huh uh huh' in the title."
"(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman."
"Unnecessary. I don't approve of that one. Although nowadays it seems we have to clarify when we are talking about a natural woman vs whatever is passing for a woman."
"I'm not going to touch that one. Pride (In the Name of Love)."
"Yes, necessary for that one, and you know U2 rarely does wrong."
"Rocket Man (I Think It’s Going To Be A Long Long Time)."
"Great song, but they blew it on the title. Rocket Man is enough."
"(Your Love Has Lifted Me) Higher and Higher."
"I'm on the fence with that one, but it's a great song so I'll allow it."
"P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing)."
"Allowed for the explanation factor, and I'm glad they didn't do that for O.P.P."
"You down with O.P.P.?"
"Yah, you know me!"
"That is the one and only proper response."
"She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft)."
"Absolutely! One of the great song titles."
"Tonight’s the Night (Gonna Be Alright)."
"I'll allow it but Rod lost me on You’re in My Heart (The Final Acclaim). That one is unnecessary. Did you know that song is really about football?"
"Soccer, you mean."
"Soccer in the US, but everywhere else it's football. So I know you can go all day on these things. I need to head out."
"Okay, one more. Dude (Looks Like a Lady)."
"Absolutely, especially because I always think of that great scene in Mrs. Doubtfire."
I love how they leave it up to the listener to fill this in. I'm sure in cars and bars across the country there's romantically disgruntled people listening to this song and filling in what they weren't willing to put up with for the sake of love.