I'm a retard

It's official. I just YOLOd my life savings on Gamestop. Yes, I am gambling - that's why I'm a retard - but more than that, imagine, hopping onto the wildest ride in stock market history. One day, I will have gotten over my bankruptcy and I can look back and say, "I was there, and it was glorious. I pushed it to the limit."

What's more, I'm having a good time. I am seized by the type of euphoria I'd feel as a kid when I got a $5 to break into quarters for an arcade game. Yes, it's all going to disappear, but I'm having more fun playing a losing game than not playing anything at all. 

I'm sitting here in glee, reading everything my fellow autists are posting on WSB (The price of $GME is too damn low!), imagining the chaos on the real Wall Street, and watching that ticker make a mockery of my hard-earned savings and latent Arrhythmia. But who cares, this is what it means to YOLO. Nobody's getting hurt except money, hedge funds, and autists. Ain't it beautiful? 

Every buy-in is an act of faith. Why believe in something higher when the only things that go higher and  ever higher are STONKS? Papa Elon says so, Papa Cohen knows so, and so does our very own legend, u/DeepFuckingValue, who's taking his $11 million to Zanzibar, and drinking Coronas in a place untouched by the 'rona. Ain't it beautiful.

No ragrets boys and girls (who are we kidding, girls aren't retarded enough to be in on this), tomorrow we might wail and despair, but today we're strapped inside the rocket ship and shooting for the moon! 

Do rich people drink corona? lol
2021-01-27 17:47:35
I'll keep everyone posted, even though we're still only in orbit, the view is beautiful from up here. 
2021-01-27 21:54:51
A few people in my friends circle joined this madness a couple of days ago. I keep asking them to send me an update a few times a day. A reporter at the White House asked about this at the press conference today so it is very on the radar of the govt. The hedge fund billionaires will certainly have lobbyists in the govt. Good luck!!
2021-01-27 22:33:03
I'm broke and have to start from scratch. Looking for my next YOLO flex. Send tips @r/wallstreetbets!
2021-02-04 13:04:17