Who are your top five people who you talk to most right now?
In what ways do they influence you?
Sir Abe asked this question in the comment section of a post by Seun.
I have read a lot of books that talk about being deliberate with whom we spend time. I have had trouble with that advice. I believe in growing up and maturing with people together. It feels difficult to build a relationship based purely on potential benefit.
Having said that, I have grown to understand that there are events and gatherings where I can make myself go often and in the process, find like minded people. I am a fan of meeting people that are hustling and always trying to improve themselves. I enjoy going to events like toastmasters, story telling event, podcasts and book signings just because of the energy in places like that.
I have also learnt to appreciate the people I have come to know during my writing journey. There are a few people here that know me more than some friends do. They also influence me more for the same reason.
To answer the question - the top 5 people that I talk to the most right now are very close family and friends. They are exactly 5 people and I talk to each of them a few times a day. Before I do anything big, I talk to each one of them and they have the most impact on my decisions. They know me more than I know myself in some areas. They are likely to give me a more objective opinion about things. They make me think about some issues in a new way.
I was hoping for a breakdown of 1 through 5 and what they provide you. Like here's mine:
1. Girlfriend. Provides me empowerment mostly for my career and art. Makes me feel like I can do anything I want. But also grounds me by not letting me think I'm inherently awesome. Reminds me of why great things happen... and it's not because someone who just happens to be great makes them happen. It's because they humble themselves and put themsleves into service of something greater. So much more here but I want to save space for 2-5
2. A relatively new Friend. Someone who's a few years a head of me but on a similar track. Finally seeing really huge professional leaps. Coming from my background I don't know that many hugely successful people. So they were always just these mythical creatures on the internet or something. Not real humans. This is my first example of seeing someone going from 'regular' person to something I consider astronomical. Few years ago I think seeing this in one of my friends would've made me feel more distance from the person, but in this case it makes me go, 'shit he's just like me.' makes me feel empowered by identity. Similar to how a lot of kids in the US hoods saw
3. Old Best Friend. Listen to details about their life and try to figure out what they want out of life. Feel more distant here because I sense we're not on the same wavelength anymore. I love what you said Keni about growing and maturing together. I always thought that too, but this relationship I think makes me believe that it's not always possible. At least if not always with the same people then not always at the same time. As in this friend might not be right for me now but in the future could be.
4. Coworker. Just talk about work and jokes.
5. Coworker. Just talk about work and jokes.
As you can see I don't really talk to that many people haha.
How about you