I was at an event at WeWork one evening in 2019. I forget what the event was about but I remember the people. All of them looked like they were serious about hustling and finding financial independence. I loved it.

There was one Ethiopian guy at the event... I knew him through mutual friends. We got talking about some common business adventures we had done in the past. I don't remember how the conversation went to weed and similar substances but I recall stating that I am looking for the real life NZT. Most people I meet don't know what NZT is or that there is a whole culture around a real life nootropic like that. But this guy was very aware. He talked about the benefits of herbs and how much we are missing out by not looking at other substances that are still not allowed in parts of the world. 

A few days later, the guy sent me an invitation to a group that meets about once a month to try a specific substance that makes your mind go deep and uncover buried thoughts. I didn't find anything about that remotely safe. Even if I were a totally healthy person, I wouldn't go for something of that nature without family or a very close friend. So I refused. When I met the guy again at another event, he explained to me that he has benefited a lot from the monthly sessions. He talked about how he understood himself more and especially the impact of the trauma he had in childhood. 

I thought about that last statement. I couldn't think of any trauma from my childhood that I may need to understand. But I am afraid of the dark. Just like I was as a kid. And the guy suggested that I may not know about the trauma my mind is burying for my benefit. I got intrigued by that. I have thought about that exchange a lot and wondered about risk-free ways to uncover and understand my mind and if there are any traumas that may have shaped how I am today