A few days after committing to a new story my thinking-brain remembers my initial elation and inspiration: the genesis that sparked the resolve: "this is the story I will be writing now." However my feeling-heart will no longer feel that tinder of motivation. Depending on how my day is going I will either quit the story or mechanically write a snippet just so I can tell myself I'm making progress. The latter route almost always produces something so uninspiring that the story becomes even harder to return to later.
What's happening here?
For me, that's the hardest thing of all and has always been. What's the fuckin' story? I can't seem to imagine the ending of stories, I cling to a naive perception that nothing really ends so it's always easy to start but impossible to finish.
GabrielGreco and I share a curse of incessant inspiration. Any little thing, such as watching a mosquito fly across a humid room can trigger us to feel like we have more than enough inspirational fuel to write our next story. This is not some psychotic delusion, it's an honest subjective feeling. It's just that that feeling doesn't last.
In Gabriel's post he wonders whether having a view of the end is important to being able to make it through the
schlep
or the middle/dip of the story where you have no idea what's happening. Reading this made me question a dogma I'd held for awhile now.
For a few years I believed the only way to write a story was to be blind to the ending. As a writer you had to be driven by mystery and curiosity. I'd formed this opinion because I fetishized how
Haruki Murakami
wrote his books.
When I start to write a story, I don’t know the conclusion at all and I don’t know what’s going to happen next. If there is a murder case as the first thing, I don’t know who the killer is. I write the book because I would like to find out. If I know who the killer is, there’s no purpose to writing the story.
When you hold a dogma, believe in something so deeply without critique for so long, you eventually come to forget that there can even be different ways. You think that your way is the only way.
When I read Gabriel's post I immediately went to go reach for the above Murakami quote to show how not knowing the ending can be good! But then while writing it I had this realization. Gabriel and I aren't Murakami. Murakami is a reserved person who doesn't engage in conversation unless he absolutely has to. Gabriel and I are loud mouths who carry soapboxes in our pockets.
For our next story maybe we should see our ending.
Hmmm, maybe I shouldn't have said all that because what Murakami is saying there also makes sense and not only that, it feels like the better approach. But don't listen to me because I'm a loudmouth and what do I know, I'll say anything for attention.
And obviously I'm 100% not Murakami. Wouldn't it be funny though if some established writer got on a community like this under an anonymous username and just started talking shit all the time and whining about how hard it is to be a writer. Then one day he writes the story about a colorful online writing community and injects it with Machiavellian drama, maybe spices it up with a murder or two, but then the plot thickens when the founder goes missing IRL! The book becomes a bestseller, online writing communities start to sprout up like mushrooms, and Abe comes out of the shadows to collect his crypto billions because he found a way to put adagia-like sites on the blockchain before disappearing.
Then the whole thing gets made into a movie with Steven Yeun as Abe, Meron Getnet in her breakout role as keni, Woody Harrelson as dealingwith, seun played by Barkhad Abdi, brianball played by Jason Statham in an actual acting role (but clearly one of the characters involved with the murders), with Mycocaine as peterdannock, John Cho (who also auditioned for the Abe role) gets in on the party as williamliao and therealbrandonwilson as himself, of course. Finally, Larry David will fill the role of Gabriel Greco, the anonymous writer.
GabrielGreco I like what you said... because I needed to really look at my attitudes on what made a good writing approach... because obviously whatever it was I've been thinking was the way hasn't been the way... for me at least.
I've been getting a lot out of your recent reflections on what drives and gets in the way of your writing.
Abe, you know what they say, "Those who can, do, those who can't, teach." So, you're welcome - now spread those wings and let that prose soar. Also, any thoughts on Yeon as you? I think he's more artistic and can really capture the struggling writer's/maker's angst.
@Keni, glad you approve. If Facebook can have a movie, so can adagia.
LOL, just trollin bro. I do think that there is something in the ability to tell somebody's age based on how they write. At the same time, I figure if I keep up with the trends, I may still write like a 40 year old at Larry David's age.
GabrielGreco
And obviously I'm 100% not Murakami. Wouldn't it be funny though if some established writer got on a community like this under an anonymous username and just started talking shit all the time and whining about how hard it is to be a writer. Then one day he writes the story about a colorful online writing community and injects it with Machiavellian drama, maybe spices it up with a murder or two, but then the plot thickens when the founder goes missing IRL!
The book becomes a bestseller, online writing communities start to sprout up like mushrooms, and Abe comes out of the shadows to collect his crypto billions because he found a way to put adagia-like sites on the blockchain before disappearing.
Then the whole thing gets made into a movie with Steven Yeun as Abe, Meron Getnet in her breakout role as
What a troll move that would be.
*Curb Your Enthusiasm theme*
I love it. Until you said it, I didn't realize how much Brian Ball looks like Jason Statham.
Let's all visualize this movie into fruition.
I've been getting a lot out of your recent reflections on what drives and gets in the way of your writing.
Also, any thoughts on Yeon as you? I think he's more artistic and can really capture the struggling writer's/maker's angst.
@Keni, glad you approve. If Facebook can have a movie, so can adagia.
one thing I'm wondering about is why did you pick
(agree that Sarajevo was a good one)